


Enough

by Onlymystory



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: First Kiss, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-12
Updated: 2019-06-12
Packaged: 2020-05-01 22:26:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19186591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onlymystory/pseuds/Onlymystory
Summary: “I could have killed you,” says Simon.“I would have let you,” says Jace.It shouldn’t mean anything, but it’s been three days and those five words are all Simon can think about.





	Enough

**Author's Note:**

> Um, so I finally started watching Shadowhunters...and naturally, i have to ship all the rarepairs. (And Malec. I'm not crazy). Simon is my life rn tho. Just, ugh, precious lil cinnamon roll.

“I could have killed you,” says Simon. 

“I would have let you,” says Jace. 

It shouldn’t mean anything. At least, it shouldn’t mean anything to Simon, but it’s been three days and those five words are all he can think about. Three days ago, Simon would have said he knew Jace. Knew that Jace would be trying to get past renewed feelings for Clary after learning they weren’t siblings. 

Sure, Jace and Clary weren’t really an option anymore, not since he and Clary had broken up weeks ago and Clary had been at Izzy’s side through her yen fen addiction and recovery. The two girls had come out of that closer than ever and with some deeper feelings they seemed to be exploring. 

Simon knew Jace wouldn’t get in the way of that. But he’d expected some moodiness. The thing is, Jace’s words came before he found out about Clary. 

And so Simon is still lost. 

* * *

 

He’s watching TV at Magnus’ house--while appreciating the soundproof bedrooms, because Alec and Magnus are LOUD--when Jace arrives. Magnus has been kind enough to expand his home, because none of them feel too comfortable at the Institute right now and have needed a retreat. 

Jace kept his room at Magnus’ loft and seems to spend more time there or training. 

Simon is there because as a daylighter, he’s a little stuck on where he can safely go. He’s also there because Jace is. Simon may feel like a coward, but he’s not stupid. 

“Oh. Uh, hey,” says Jace, seemingly startled that Simon is there. “I was just training.”

Simon is definitely listening and not watching a bead of sweat make its way down the rune at Jace’s throat and wishing he could trace the path with this tongue.

“Simon?”

“Yeah?” Simon shakes his head and actually looks at Jace. 

It’s a terrible idea. Jace’s eyes are still haunted, even under the flush of exertion in his face and the way his chest moves as he breathes. 

Jace shrugs. “Seemed like you zoned out for a minute there.”

“Yeah, no, I was just thinking, and um this show is really interesting and…”   
Jace cuts him off. “Simon, chill.” He walks towards his bedroom. “I need a shower.”

Simon thinks about Jace in the shower and he thinks about also being in that shower and he thinks about how he now needs a cold shower and his mouth runs away with him before he can stop it. “Why were you willing to die to save me?”

“What?”

“When you let me feed,” says Simon, because he’s started this conversation and he’s already damned, so he might as well get some answers. “You said you would have let me kill you, if I’d needed that much blood.”

Jace gives that little head shake he does, the one Simon has learned means that Jace is trying to be dismissive rather than admit he cares. “Valentine thought I was Clary. If he believed she was dead, he wouldn’t think to activate the soul stone.”

“No!”

“No?”

Simon moves across the room at vamp speed, stopping Jace from closing the door on the conversation and following him into his bedroom. “We were away from Valentine by then. You told me that when it was just us. There was no one to convince you were doing the sacrificial thing.”

“The right thing,” returns Jace. “If I’d let you drain me, the soul sword wouldn’t have activated and all those downworlders wouldn’t be dead.”

Simon shakes his head, touches Jace’s arm gently. “You may end up doing the right thing, but you always do it through a sacrifice play. Why sacrifice for me? You don’t even like me.”

Jace turns ever so slightly, pushing into Simon’s touch rather than away. “Is that really what you think?”

“N...no. What I really think...is…”

“Simon?” Jace’s voice is ever so soft and his eyes are desperate and the part of Simon that is terrified is far outmatched by the part that wants to be as brave as the man in front of him. 

“I don’t want you to die,” Simon whispers and he leans in the last few inches and kisses Jace. 

Jace’s hands move up, sliding to Simon’s waist and up his back, until one is wrapped in his hair, the other pressed against him, pulling him closer into Jace. They kiss like its their last, desperate and needy. They kiss like its their first, soft and uncertain. Mostly, Simon kisses Jace like this is one of many, learning what he likes and what he loves, relishing the taste. 

“Please stop letting people try to kill you,” begs Simon, following his words with another kiss and pulling Jace’s head back down. 

Jace continues to kiss him back, hands grasping tight as though he can pull them close enough to turn them into one person. “Okay, Simon. Okay.”

It’s one word, just one. It’s enough.


End file.
